Hung literati, Tolstoy, and vodka

Dane shared my love of Tolstoy and oral sex. I affectionately called him Great Dane because his penis was as long and thick as War and Peace. He was that perfect combination of well-educated and well endowed. He remarked that War and Peace was daunting but he dove in and loved it. I felt the same way about his dick. As I was going down on him, I imagined I was the Grande Armee of Napoleon marching across the vast steppe of Russia – my only goal conquest and glory. His stamina was great and like the fierce resistance put up by the Russians at the Battle of Borodino, Great Dane held out. I made flanking movement to his balls, ass, and nipples; he was outgunned and outtongued. His surrender was, however,  temporary; he lived to fight another day and our battles kept me occupied most of that hot steamy summer.

After lengthy oral sex with a fan of Russian literature, I need to relax with a refreshing cocktail. I take one part Grey Goose pear (it has to be vodka after all) and one part Simply Lemonade and shake vigorously. Add a dash of  diet Sprite for carbonation and stir. Hefty novels or hefty penises – this is something we can all drink to.

The Battle of Borodino as depicted by Louis Le...

The Battle of Borodino as depicted by Louis Lejeune. The battle was the largest and bloodiest single-day action of the Napoleonic Wars. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)